This is part one of Beyond The Magic. The purpose of the Beyond The Magic storytelling project is to highlight the full experiences and humanity of Black women; beyond our magic and beyond the expectations of others. Interested in contributing to this project? Let’s connect!

Meet Bianca!

How do you define Black Girl Magic?

Black women being unapologetically themselves and effortlessly and innately reflecting the glory of God.

How do you define Black Excellence?

Black existence that simultaneously edifies the community.

Describe a time when you felt the need to shrink yourself or code-switch to mentally or physically survive.

It’s easier to describe a time I have not had to do that. That being said, in graduate school, I was placed (presumably on purpose) on a panel about racism for a class assignment. I was not the only POC but I was the only person who identified as Black in the room at that time. The prompts for discussion would have caused me to mentally have to go to places of unhealed hurt in order to answer fully and honestly. It was graduate school — I didn’t have the emotional capacity or the energy at the time to go there. I was also facing a room full of eyes on faces that looked a lot like the perpetrators of said hurt. Still, this was an assignment and I felt required to participate so as not to ruffle feathers or receive a bad grade. So I did what came naturally — I limited my commentary and was careful to ensure the comments I did make were as diplomatic as possible. In hindsight, that just deepened the hurt I was trying to avoid.

What does it look like to hold space for grief?

I think understanding that it’s a process that isn’t linear and that it manifests in various ways does this. Normalizing the variation of grief, even in its messiness, allows us to have more grace on ourselves and others. This grace is essential for the healing process.

What does it look like to hold space for joy?

I think taking time to recognize what actually fills us and brings us joy is a first step. From there, we can hold space by making a practice of intentionally engaging in things that bring joy, especially when we don’t feel like it.

Pause and think about all the stereotypes, expectations, or assumptions placed on Black women. What do you want to say to counter those stereotypes/expectations/assumptions? What's your truth?

Black women are people, too! Haha It needs to be accepted and normalized for us to explore and express our humanity like other people. We are allowed to be angry, bitter, tired, happy, sad, joyous, sexual, conservative — all of the things because those come with the task of being a human who has experiences. And when we work through any and all of those aspects of our humanity, it doesn’t need to be a representation of every Black woman. Even with our similarities, we are still so unique. And that’s what makes us “magic.”

"I am home when..."

... I can be completely myself without hesitation.

"Justice is..."

... being released from the bind of explicit self-interest.

"Love is..."

... freedom.

What words of wisdom would you give to your childhood self?

Don’t shrink, bend, or fall back from pursuing what you know to be true. People’s feelings may get hurt and they may not even like you, but that comes with the territory of truth-telling. You don’t need to take responsibility for everyone’s feelings. Speak and walk in the Truth.