“You’re a seed planter,” is how a former colleague referred to me. She meant I had a wealth of knowledge and resources and, while my time with a particular social justice movement was evolving and coming to an end, I chose to take what I knew and what I learned to evoke courage for those who stayed with the hopes that they would nurture the change that desperately needed to happen.

I, as she described it and others joined in, provided the seeds and informed my colleagues where they could find water, fertilizer, and how much sun any particular change needed. I promised to check in from time to time, but nurturing wasn’t my gift because I was a visionary. And for some time, I’ve worn that sentiment as a badge of honor.

The word “nurture” has weighed on me progressively over the past year, and overwhelming for the past month. I wrote a piece for Carefree Magazine last summer about why I chose to shave my head in 2019, and how I’ve been nurturing new growth since. I settled on “nurture” as my word for 2021 after a year (and then some) of learning how to be “confident” and “assured” in the work, people, and places I’m called to.

But as I’ve confidently moved to New York City (in the middle of a pandemic), gotten engaged, and taken steps (and two business coaches!) to settle on a business plan, I’ve planted many seeds and now someone needs to tend to the ground. It sounds impossible, but that someone has to be me.

It takes patience, commitment, and a steady process to experience fruit, whether it’s organizational change, relational growth, or individual transformation. But let’s be honest: There ain’t nothing cute about nurturing. There ain’t nothing cute about the process. But we all know it’s happening and we all have to go through it.

Who knows what seeds are doing when they’re buried in the dirt—before we see colorful flowers or luscious succulents or a moody Ficus tree (just me?). I may have been a “seed planter” for a season (a very long season) while working at certain organizations, but I have to be a nurturer every day in my own life—I can’t pass that torch to anyone else.

Some of the areas I’m nurturing this year—with the same confidence as last year—include:

my prayers (rain or shine, trial or triumph, prayer should be as easy as breathing),
writing (namely publishing the 50-leven books I’ve been sitting on, and breaking into screenwriting),
relationships (family, friends, and fiancé),
therapy, Black girl joy, & ongoing healing (thank God for Therapy for Black Girls cause it’s hard out here),
creativity (taking more risks and shooting more shots),
finances (so I can continue to be blessed to be a blessing… and quit my full-time job by December), and
my plant babies (they teach me a lot about how to nurture all the other areas of life)

What are you nurturing this year?